When Sidney and I give Engaged Encounter retreats, the first night we deliver a presentation titled “Understanding Myself.” The idea is that before an engaged couple can truly understand each other, they must be able to understand themselves as individuals. One way that we become the people we are today is through the families we grew up in.
In this particular presentation, Sidney and I dive into our respective families and describe how they shaped the individuals we are today. Although we address some major themes with our familial clans, we also touch on some granular, lighthearted topics—such as the beverages we drank growing up! Sid and I contrast the drinks at our dinner tables during our childhoods with my wife mentioning that each Mathis meal was served with your choice of a tall glass of Coke or a tall glass of sweet tea. In my household, we were given the choice of milk or water.

My family drank either water or milk growing up at the dinner table.
I give that backstory to explain a humorous TikTok video my sister sent Sid and me the other day. It showed a young woman (@laurenenslow) looking perplexed as she navigated the differing restaurant ordering preferences of her husband’s family. The TikTok explained that the woman grew up in a “water and no apps” family while her husband belongs to a “soda and apps” family.

This is one of the opening frames of TikTok user @laurenenslow’s video about “soda and app” families. After giving this perplexed look the video then shows a table with drinks and an appetizer with her significant other digging in.
We couldn’t help but laugh at the video because it explains Sid and me perfectly. Growing up in my family, eating at a restaurant was always a very special and fun experience but it didn’t mean we were guzzling soft drinks and eating potato skins. Much to the chagrin of my siblings and me, my parents would order us a round of waters. Appetizers? The only “starter” we were getting was if the restaurant offered free chips or bread.

Our family eating at Prospector’s, a delicious restaurant in North Spokane. Portions were so huge at this restaurant that appetizers were never needed.
In Sidney’s family, their restaurant table would be lined with glasses filled with different colored sodas, teas, and lemonades. Ordering an appetizer (or two) was always an option as well.
I have to give my parents credit, by the time we reached late high school/college, the embargo on drinks/apps was lifted. We were often free (and even encouraged) to order a soda or beer. I point to the opening of P.F. Chang’s in downtown Spokane as the shift. When our family started eating celebratory and holiday meals there, my mom and dad would order us the lettuce wraps.

My family loving life at P.F. Chang’s in November of 2011. You might notice that we have the lettuce wraps as an appetizer but us “kids” are all drinking waters.
So now that Sidney and I have our own family, you might be wondering if we are a “water and no apps” family or a “soda and apps” family. I would say that we are a “sometimes soda family and rarely apps family” . Many of the restaurants we frequent include a soda with items ordered off the kid’s menu. When it comes to appetizers, ordering a Blooming Onion at Outback is a non-negotiable but other than that we try to refrain. As for me personally? I still order a glass of water more often than not.

Thought I would end this post of an instance where we splurged on drinks for the kids in an open air restaurant as they ordered Shirley Temples. Can I make a confession? Beau and Sloan actually paid for those drinks by themselves with the vacation allowance we gave them prior to departing Spokane .
What “type” of a family are you? Don’t Blink.