Just like anyone else in this modern era of communication I rely on text messaging…a lot. Also, just like most people, I have my own distinctive style of texting. If you are a close friend of mine, you most likely have a good grasp on how I text. But if you aren’t in my inner circle you probably don’t. No need to worry, I am here tonight to reveal my text messaging playbook. Here are the top five characteristics of a text messaging conversation with Brent Reser.

1. Impeccable Grammar/Spelling: Besides the add-ins and quirks you will see below that don’t abide with normal APA guidelines, I do my very best to text with strong attention to conventional detail. I spell words out, I use commas, and I make sure my sentences have agreement in them. My brother, sister, and I all play a game where if one of us catches the other committing a grammatical or spelling error in a text we send it right back to the violator without even addressing what they said.

I remember the major grammar/spelling rules when texting.

2. Hashtags: It should come as no surprise to most of you that I hashtag the heck out of my text messages. As I work in social media for a living and as I liberally utilize hashtags in my handwritten conversations it only comes naturally that I take the time to incorporate several hashtags in my texts. I don’t do it just to be different though. I firmly believe in hashtags as the best punctuation mark that exists. The ability to summarize and express thoughts with the “pound sign” is a great technological advancement and I make no apologies about using it every chance I get.

Use hashtags as if they were going out of style.

3. Emoticons: As I have wrote about in detail before, I am a sucker for emoticons. In fact, I have come to rely on them even more since I wrote my post on the subject. Just like the hashtag, emoticons do a great job at conveying emotion and thoughts that you otherwise would not receive out of ordinary text. I enjoy using them in large quantities and at random. However, I also take time to place them in clever spots to make the perfect text as well. I absolutely abuse the faces and my general rule of thumb is that if you always at least stick a smiley face at the end of a text you can pretty much say anything you want.

Basically anything can pass if you put a smiley face at the end of it.

4. CAPS: For whatever reason this puzzles people a lot but I usually mix in at least one all caps word in each text I send. I usually fully capitalize either the noun or verb (sometimes both) in many of my texts. It makes my messages stand out and kind of serves as my number one texting trademark.

For every text message I am a big proponent of at least one word in all caps.

5. Question Marks/Repeat Message: Sometimes I am not as patient as I would like. If I send someone a text message and I don’t get a response within five minutes I might pester that individual with a string of 20 question marks. If I am feeling really bored and maybe a little perturbed I will hit copy and paste a few times and fill up the person’s texting screen with question mark galore. If I want to really insult the person’s intelligence I will do the classic repeat text where I send the exact same message back to the person that I had sent five minutes before. Come on, we all know how stupid doing this is as obviously the person received the message the first time. However, it does do the job of getting across a sense of urgency. But in all honesty I don’t really do it because I am on pins and needles and expect an answer right away…rather, I do it just to be a jerk and pull the other person’s chain.

This is a very annoying tactic that should be used sparingly.

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Now don’t you just want to get in a long text messaging conversation with me? If you haven’t already put my number on your block list I will let you know that I am really not that bad. I will keep you entertained and always clearly communicate with while texting. Just please, don’t make me wait longer than five minutes for a response. Don’t Blink..