You Want Me to Put WHAT in My Car?!

Last night I was driving without a care in the world when something happened that made me groan and worry just a bit: My engine light went on. Knowing that I really couldn’t do anything about it at the moment I just crossed my fingers that my car wouldn’t break down. My car made it back to my apartment without any major catastrophe and it got me to work this morning (with the light still on).

After my workout I drove a little off of campus to find a mechanic that I could hopefully take my car to. Because I needed a place that wouldn’t be too far for me to walk back to campus once I dropped it off and when I went to pick it up, my options were limited. My little search yielded only one real possible place. Called Conway Wrecker, it was a junkyard for wrecked cars. However, underneath the main business sign was an added on wooden plank with the words “Mechanic on Duty.” This was going to be the only feasible option.

This is the sign at Conway Wreckers. Notice the "Mechanic on Duty" sign.

This is the sign at Conway Wreckers. Notice the “Mechanic on Duty” sign.

As Conway Wrecker didn’t open up until 8:30 a.m., I had a nice little trip to look forward to later that day. Right at the start of the lunch hour I drove back to the place, parked my car among all the chaos, and approached the guy hard at work. Picture your typical mechanic with a wireless phone device attached to his head. I explained my problem and he said he could help me. I walked off the premises and made the stroll back to campus I kept thinking about how bad my car could be potentially messed up.

Welcome to Conway Wreckers.

Welcome to Conway Wreckers.

At 2 p.m. I noticed my phone ringing with an unfamiliar incoming number. Knowing it would be the mechanic I held my breath, took the call, and waited for the bad news. Well, I ended up not hearing any bad news…but that was because I didn’t really hear any news at all. Between the noise in my building, the noise at his shop, and the mechanic’s deep southern accent I had a lot of trouble deciphering the conversation. All I heard him kept saying was “water in the gas tank” and “Everclear.” Giving up on understanding what he was saying I told him I would just see him soon.

I made the walk back to the Conway Wrecker. It was a short delay because the mechanic was on his wireless headset. When he concluded his call he was able to tell me face-to-face the issue with my car. He explained that the o2 sensor was messed up because my gas tank had water in it. He said that this commonly occurs in the South because of the humidity mixed with the heavy spurts of rain. He then told me what I needed to do to fix it:

“You are going to think I am crazy but you need to put Everclear in your gas tank. I have been in this business a long time and I know that will work.”

Hmmmmmm. Okay. After a walk to the ATM of the nearby convenient store to withdraw cash since the mechanic wouldn’t accept my debit card I hopped in my car and went back to work. At a traffic light I had Googled putting Everclear in your gas tank. Only a few results came up and the people posting in these forums all said it was a wasteful idea. However, when I arrived in the parking lot at work I quizzed a co-worker on the advice I had been given. He backed the advice of the mechanic and also said Conway Wreckers had a solid team working there. I reasoned that I since I had paid the man basically for his advice, I was going to heed it.

After work I went and picked out my Halloween costume and then went to a liquor store. The mechanic told me to only put a pint in. Unfortunately, the store only had liters. Before you start thinking that I should think positive because it would mean that I would have leftover alcohol for myself, think again…I don’t touch that stuff.

The lady behind the register tried to make small talk with me on how I planned to consume the Everclear. After a couple questions I just looked her straight in the eye and told her I was using it to put into my car. She had definitely never heard that one before.

Me getting ready to put Everclear in my car.

Me getting ready to put Everclear in my car.

Sidney and I went back out into the parking lot, I opened up the bottle, and I poured half of it into my gas tank. It seemed so wrong. I turned on my car and the engine light was still on (to be expected). However, after driving my car around a little bit the light is still as bright as ever. A complete waste of time, money, and alcohol.

Yep. I put Everclear in my car. Complete waste of money and time.

Yep. I put Everclear in my car. Complete waste of money and time.  

Who knows though, maybe the light will go off when I drive home from my girlfriend’s place tonight. It is several miles back to my apartment complex and maybe that will give the Everclear more time to work its magic. I sure hope so, a story like this is too good to not end with a happy outcome. Don’t Blink.

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