This morning driving to work I changed the radio when my sports talk program went to commercial and I landed on a FM morning show. I listened in as the DJ spoke about a topic that gets beaten to death on these types of programs all the time. Not only does the topic get brought up way too much to begin with but I am pretty sure that most of the stories surrounding it are complete bunk. Let me explain.

When I changed the channel and landed on this radio show I heard the DJ crack over the airwaves that dreaded question… “Ladies, what is the worst pickup line that a guy has ever used on you before?” I immediately hit my head on the steering wheel. Here we go again. But instead of changing back to my sports program so I could hear the testosterone and razor ads I decided to continue to listen to the current station so just maybe I would have the motivation to write this blog post tonight.

Not all FM radio is bad. There are some great DJs out there, including many great local ones here in Missoula who I know personally. But there are also some bad ones. And let me tell you, these bad ones like to use the “worst pick up line” question about once every week. I don’t know of any question that is more unoriginal or unfunny as that question. In fact, I think the only thing that is more unoriginal or unfunny than that question is the answers.

I am convinced that the women who call in to this question are either working for the radio station in some way and are forced to chime in with some phony answer or they are just women calling in who also see the absurdity in the question and decide to make up the biggest whopper they can. Sorry, I am just not buying it when Rose calls in and says that some guy came up to her in a bar and slyly uttered “Are you religious? Cause you’re the answer to all my prayers.”

Pick up lines are corny one-liners that you find in magazines and on the internet. They are meant to provide a few laughs now and then. They are not meant to actually be used in a courting situation. When you tell a knock-knock joke you don’t literally go up to someone’s door and knock twice. Similarly, when you use a pick-up line you don’t literally go up to a girl and use it. While I know there are some guys in this world who lack brains and who might actually go up to a girl and randomly say “Do you have a band-aid? I scrapped my knee falling for you,” I know that 98% of men have more sense than that. Most of us know that in order to engage a woman you have to be charming and interesting…not stupid.

I have to believe that the DJs who pose the pick up question on air know this truth. I am guessing they just bank on the reality that people will call in and provide answers, even if it is straight baloney. I am also guessing that the DJs might consider their audience on the less intelligent side, thinking that their listeners might actually believe the calls coming in. This very well could be true, there could be (and probably are) people out there who eat up some of the pick up lines being reported. They might believe that some dude actually said that to the girl on the line, even if she really only ripped it off of some internet site. There are always the people who will believe anything.

But I personally don’t believe everything, especially things that are obviously not true. I know I am going to hear the pick up line question about 100 more times (and that is just in the next six months) but I do wish the radio industry would retire it for good. Nothing stimulating ever comes from unoriginality and lies. Don’t Blink.