Sloan woke up especially early this morning. We put her in our bed to watch Mickey Mouse while we got ready for the day. Sidney went outside to put a few items in her car. Several seconds after she walked out, I dashed after her. With great alarm in my voice, I exclaimed, SIDNEY! Sloan just threw up all over herself and the bed!

With us running on such a tight schedule, a soiled bed and a sick child was the last thing we needed. Sidney let out a big groan. However, I wasn’t going to keep her in misery for long.

APRIL FOOLS’, Sid! April Fools’.

Relief and a little bit of anger set in. I offered an apology and we went on with our morning.

I felt a little bad pulling that prank because, to be honest, I don’t like April Fools’ Day myself. I especially despise how it plays out on social media, something I made perfectly clear four years ago. But my desire to subtly celebrate today got the best of me this morning.

Here is my philosophy on April Fools’ jokes: First, stay away from social media pranks. Nothing asks for shameless attention more than a sad attempt at announcing you are moving to a different country or that you are pregnant when really you are not.

The second half of my philosophy is to startle, not excite. Wait, what does that even mean?…

What I mean is this – play a joke that delivers bad news (will cause a startle), not a joke that delivers good news (will excite the person). Does this confuse you even more? I believe a joke is more cruel that gives someone hope that something really good happened to them (won the lottery, received a promotion, etc.) than a joke that gives someone a negative jolt (accident happened, made a big mistake, etc.).

I feel like if you must play a joke on someone, leave the person with a positive emotion rather than a negative emotion. Pulling someone’s leg in a way that they are happy a bad event never happened is better than making someone sad that a good event never did. To lift up someone’s hopes only to crush them is not very funny…it is mean.

Still have a gag up your sleeve for the remaining hours of April Fools’ Day? If so, I hope your execution is seamless and the joke itself funny for all involved. Don’t Blink.