I am one of those people who love to be outside. Living in Montana where the weather is pretty miserable for three quarters of the year, you learn to really savor the decent weather and the sunshine that comes from about the start of July through mid September. On the weekends during this time period, I take advantage of it to the max. I make it a point to hang outside as much as possible. I hike, float, swim, play sports, watch sports, go to festivals, and do my favorite things such as reading, blogging, and journaling outside. Because of my time outdoors, my skin darkens…a lot.
My mom is full Italian and she definitely passed along her darker skin complexion genes to me. I could pretty much step outside the house and step back in during a 90 degree sunny day and gain some color. Lucky for me, I tan rather than burn except in rare circumstances. I guess you could say it is the one positive trait that I received in exchange for all the others I missed out on (good looks, naturally beautiful teeth, height, built body, pretty eyes, athleticism, good personality, smartness, skills with girls, etc. etc.).
When you combine the facts that I pretty much live outside during the summer weekends and that I tan incredibly easily, then you can probably imagine that I get pretty dark. This is definitely the case. During the summer, I probably receive ten comments a day on how tan I am. I get called black, Mexican, Arabian, Jamaican, and many more. When I was in Arizona this summer, there were several Mexican guests at my hotel. Numerous times these people would come up to me and start asking me questions in Spanish, believing that I was one of them. Three years in Spanish did teach me enough to remember “No hablo espanol.” People ask me what type of tropical vacation did I just get back from or they ask if I am keeping the sun all to myself. I don’t mind all these different types of comments. They do start to get old and I do look at myself in the mirror each day so I do know what I look like but I don’t mind them.
What really bothers me is when people accuse me of fake tanning. This usually happens when I am out downtown and people who don’t know me, especially dumb dudes who don’t have lives and who have not one girl remotely close to them, decide to pop off at me. They might say something like “went a little too long in the tanning bed?” or “save some bronzer for the rest of the humanity.” When these losers say this to me I do defend myself. I should probably not give them the time of day and walk off but I don’t do that, especially not after a few drinks. I make sure it never gets physical but I do put them in their place. Ask me sometime how I do this.
The point of this post is that I just want to officially state to everyone that I have never fake tanned in my life. I have never set foot in a tanning bed, never bought an over the counter tanning product, never gotten sprayed. I hate the unnatural look that it produces and it just does not appeal to me to sit in some chamber or have someone cover my body in some weird mist. When I think of fake tanning I think of bodybuilders who go absolutely over the top for their competitions and put so much artificial tanning garbage on themselves that they look disgusting. No thank you.
So please believe me when I say that I do not take measures to tan. I am simply a person who has a naturally darker skin complexion than most white people that is magnified during the summer. Unless I commit some heinous crime and get locked up in solitary confinement in some hard nosed prison I will continue to look dark…this guido just loves the outdoors too much. Don’t Blink.
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